New relationships are most often filled with passion and sexual intimacy is rarely an issue. As time passes, though, partners can experience a decrease in sexual desire and an overall dip in intimacy that can be brought about by numerous factors. If you’re noticing that your wife is not interested in intimacy that much anymore, you should approach that from a place of understanding and try to figure out what it is that could be, well, killing the passion.
It is important for you not to jump to any conclusions and immediately assume that your wife no longer loves you or that she is not attracted to you anymore. You don’t have to be the cause of this problem at all. Don’t regard this as a personal attack and try to talk to your partner about it in a sensitive and empathetic way. As mentioned, reasons for lack of interest in intimacy can be numerous, and I’ll now get you familiar with some of those so that when you start a conversation with your wife, you can do it considerately and with a sense of understanding.
What Could Be The Reasons For The Lack Of Interest In Intimacy?
The causes of this lack of interest can range from physical to emotional and psychological. Hormonal changes, certain medical conditions, or medications that your wife may be taking could negatively impact her libido. Aging and menopause can also be the causes, since a woman experiences various physical symptoms in menopause, while it can also take a toll on their overall mental and emotional health.
First off, the vaginal lining will become less moisturized and lose elasticity with age, which can lead to sex feeling more uncomfortable for the woman. It is not uncommon for females to lose their sex appetite due to that. Read more on sex and menopause, so as to understand what changes to expect.
Apart from the physical causes, we’ve also mentioned that some emotional and psychological issues could affect your wife’s desire to be intimate with you. Those can include stress, anxiety, depression, and various other mental health issues. Plus, if your wife is having issues with her self-esteem, that can take a toll on her desire to have sex and on your overall intimacy, since she won’t feel good about herself. Having an open and honest dialogue and helping your wife feel sexier could help in that case.
What To Do About It?
If you and your partner have been together for a long time, you should be able to freely and openly communicate about things like these. So, the first thing to do when you notice a lack of interest is talk to your wife openly and try to get to the bottom of the problem. Naturally, it should go without saying that you shouldn’t place any blame on anyone and that healthy conversations filled with understanding is necessary.
Conversation alone, however, cannot always resolve the problem. Or, at least conversation between you and your wife can’t. Your partner may not know what’s causing her to lose interest in intimacy, which is why she may feel attacked and under pressure when you start up a conversation in an effort to increase her desire and improve her libido. Even if you mean well, and I’m sure you do, you could unintentionally hit a sore spot.
You’re not the first person to struggle with the question of why my wife isn’t interested in intimacy and, fortunately, there is something you two can do so as to be more effective in solving the problem. Basically, you could agree on seeing a marriage or a sex therapist and let professionals give you their two cents. It is important, though, to rule out any organic problems first, which is why visiting a general practitioner could also help.
Therapy can help even when those organic issues exist, though, because the physical problems are bound to have an impact on emotions as well. So, regardless of the reasons for the lack of intimacy, or even if you don’t know the reasons yet, visiting a marriage or a sex therapist can be of enormous help. Suggest this to your wife to see how she will respond to the idea, but remember that you can’t, and shouldn’t even try to, force anyone to do something they don’t want.